Clock Puns

Time Flies When You’re Laughing: A Comical Collection of Clock Puns

If you’re looking for some fun, look no further than this list of jokes, puns and one liners about clocks. Whether you’re a fan of the classics or prefer something more modern, there’s something here to make you chuckle. Let’s take a look at these tick-ling timepieces!

Funny Clock Jokes

When you need a funny joke about clocks, look no further than these tried and true favorites.

What did the clock do when it was hungry? It went back four seconds.
Why didn’t the clock work? It needed a hand.
Why can’t you trust a clock? Because it always has its hands in your pocket!
Why is it so hard to solve problems with clocks? They are always ticking away.
What did the wall clock say to the grandfather clock? Look dad, no hands!
Why don’t clocks ever run late? Because they’re always on time!
Why don’t watches tell jokes? They’d rather just keep track of time.
What kind of music do clocks like best? Tick Tock Rock!
What does a broken watch do all day long? Absolutely nothing – it’s stopped working!
What did one clock say to the other clock that was running late? “Watch your hands!”
What did the robber say to the clock? Hands up
Why did the clock break up with the stopwatch? Because they had different times.
Why did the wall clock get kicked out of the bar? Because it was two-faced.
Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he wanted to see time fly.
Why don’t clocks ever get sick? They always keep ticking.
What’s a clock’s favorite social media? Tick-tock.
Why did the watch break up with the clock? They just didn’t have the right timing.

Clock pun writing overlay on clock picture

Witty Clock Puns and One Liners

These puns and one liners are perfect for any clock fan out there.

The clock factory was running out of time.
I bought a clock from a store that was going out of business. It was a timely purchase.
Did you hear about the clock that went back four seconds? It was time traveling.
My boss told me to clock in early, but I was already ahead of time.
Why did the clock go to the library? To kill time.
I accidentally swallowed a clock. It’s fine, I just have a little bit of time in me.
What do you call a clock that’s always late? A tardy-clock.
I have a clock that runs on potatoes. It’s a tuber-ticking device.
I have a clock that looks like a belt. It’s a waist of time.
The clock got a job at the restaurant, but it was only allowed to work a few minutes a day. It was a short order cook.
Why did the clock join a gym? It wanted to get in shape for daylight saving time.
If I worked in a clock shop, I’d have the time of my life.
I’d tell you a joke about daylight saving time, but it’s too time-consuming.
My clock is a little slow, but it’s always fashionably late.
Clocks are like cats – they’re always right twice a day.
My clock and I go way back – we have a timeless bond.
The clock was a bit nervous about its job interview, but it had good timing.
Time waits for no one, except for that one person who’s always fashionably late.
My clock is like a superhero – always saving me from being tardy.
The clock and I are on the same page – we’re just ticking away at life.
I used to hate working at the clock factory, but then I realized it was time well spent.
The clock may be ticking, but it’s still time for a quick laugh.
What’s a clock’s favorite book? ‘The Time Traveler’s Guide to the Universe.’